Eventually, it is nearly April! I can feel my positivity slipping away and the stress beginning to build up. Luckily I have lots of assignments and music practice to do to try and while away the days and kids exam results to wait for as well as my usual lovely mornings and days out with Theo.
Theo is my little sunshine and without him this would be so much worse. Although the people who say 'at least you have Theo' should really think before they open their mouths. As if Lee and I don't know and that little boy is our whole world. However, this is still our baby too and that's like me saying to a woman with a normal pregnancy, 'well don't worry if anything goes wrong and you lose that baby, you already have one/two'. It makes no difference, a loss is still a loss and still as painful. There will still be grief and pain. People don't seem to have the sense to realise that.
The worst thing is, I feel that this baby is fine, as I did with Theo, but I won't let myself truly believe it in case I am wrong. I am hoping to have the test as soon as possible so hopefully will hear from my consultant today that I can have it at 10 weeks.
Fingers crossed, as ever
No comments:
Post a Comment