It's beginning to look a lot like xmas

It's been a while since I updated. Been, as per, very busy but happy.

First of all, we moved house and now live in Cambois. While nothingis ever perfect, I have never slept as well as I do here since Ellie went to play on the stars and I think that probably has a big impact. Granted, I'm still tired often but not so much. It's a lovely flat and I can't wait to get a Xmas tree for it!

The charity is going well. Our first lot of boxes are virtually done and ready to send. I am going to use different boxes for future deliveries but it's a good start. 4Louis have been a massive help and they are fast becoming good friends.

The bad news is that we are no further forward with genetics, who have no results and need more DNA but can't seem to be bothered to let us know what is going on. I am going to keep ringing until I find out.

Working at boots for a month has been alright, the job is actually OK mostly and the people are really nice. I think it has helped me a lot. I seem to have a lot less anxiety right now and my tablets have been taken down to 10mg which is a big step. I'm coping fairly well right now apart from having little time and being tired.

I'm quite excited for Xmas, mostly because I am spoiling Lee and the rest of my family. Happy times with discount at boots. It is also hard though. It is coming up to the time we found out about Ellie's disease and her first birthday is just around the corner. I miss her so much it hurts, though I try and repress those feelings most days. Not because I don't want to miss her or care, I just don't want to break down in front of people. I am getting her a Tinkerbell snow globe for Xmas. A fairy for my fairy.

Ellie, I love you so much, more every day. I hope you know x

Magic moments

My life is so busy right now. It's like it used to be and I love it. So much to aim for.

Had a really moving moment today. Yesterday, I went into Bedlington's answer to Starbucks, Root Bean (it is lush in there) and asked them about having one of their acoustic and tapas nights for charity. I was the manager I spoke to, explained what we were about and about Ellie. She told me a family member (her niece I think) is seriously ill with a very rare kidney disease. I asked if she would like one of our boxes and she said yes. So I took it in today. The paediatric boxes need changing a bit but I took her a box with craft kits and colouring things, the scrap book, a snow globe etc. This woman asked if she could hug me. I didn't realise we could have such an effect on people. I want people in their situation to know there is always someone thinking of them and that we just want to see them smile, if only for a minute or two. I felt amazing and it made my day that I could help in some small way.

In other news, my grade 6 piano is on the 17th. I am actually nearly ready....ish. My pieces are getting there, so gonna do a lot more tomorrow.

I have my induction at Boots on Friday too. Hope it's gonna be ok working there. Should pass quickly with it being Xmas nearly, and at the metro centre.

My anxiety is slowly getting better. It's there but not so much. Hope it continues to get better!